It’s Not Fair (Mere Misunderstandings Pt 4)

This is not fair, I don’t know what the problem is and she won’t talk to me and as much as I wanted to go to events to make her face facts that we would still see each other, tonight was not fun. It was not fair to me.

As I’ve stated before, I am quiet. I am shy. It does take me awhile to open up to people. Don’t take me for granted because when you lose my trust it will take even longer to get it back.

Well, tonight I was at a party at a friends house and as far as I knew, my friend that was having the issues with me was not coming. Then as we were eating dinner, one of my other friends asks the hostess if it would be ok for her and her husband to show up after 8.

At first I was thinking it would be nice to see her and see how things go. But after awhile I started dreading it. When I heard that they had arrived I was having a little panic moment by myself as there was no one that I could turn to. No one at this party knows the problems that are going on or what the issues are. So I’m sitting talking to some friends. She walks in with her husband, doesn’t make any attempt to say hi to me or come over to me. I’m feeling awkward because I don’t know how to act around her anymore.

At one point in the evening her husband said ‘hi how are you?’ and another moment her and I kinda looked at each other and smiled, but I had no idea what to say, what attempts to make.

This is not fair on me. She feels that I’m always correcting her but now I feel like I can’t be myself around her which is just making me clam up. I was pretty fine when we were on separate sides of the room but when we were all playing a game I didn’t know what to do.

I love her and care about her, but if I can’t be myself around her then I don’t know what kind of friendship this will be. It’s not fair to me, it’s not fair what she’s putting me through. She thinks it’s hard on her, but she won’t give me the chance to explain how I feel to let her know what I’m thinking, how all of this is affecting me.

I can’t call her because I know she won’t answer and if I need to leave a message chances are I’m going to break down again and won’t be able to talk. Text messages never come across the way one wants them to. I want to express myself to her, but I don’t know how, the best way would be for me to talk to her in person but she doesn’t want to give me that option of a chance.

HELP! Anyone! Advice, I could really use some clear sound advice!

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