Being the Odd Wheel

So as we all know, yes, I am single, unattached, no perspectives in site. But this does not seem to phase certain friends who have found their happiness. They think that  I can hang out with a group of couples, the guys do their thing and us girls do our thing and things are fine.

I’m sorry, but no. I don’t want to be the extra wheel. I see my friends all lovey dovey and can’t help but be jealous of what they have. It hurts me to hang out with couples and not to have my close girlfriends understand this.

I have two friends from high school that have recently gotten married. I understand that they want their husbands to be friends. That they want us girls to get to know their husbands. And yes there is a time for that, but there should also be a time for just the girls.

So for Christmas, even though I had expressed my concerns and not wanting it to be the five of us (hence me being the fifth wheel) Since we were getting together on a weekend I gave in, so that I would make one friend in particular happy, so that we could do something the 5 of us. Yes, because we were at one of my friends houses the guys did go off and do their own thing for awhile and we did have some girl time.

But now we are in the midst of planning a joint birthday get together. Again she asks if we can do it the 5 of us. This time we are only planning on a week night at a coffee shop. Do you really think that this friend will have her husband and the other husband sit at one table at the other side of the coffee shop while the 3 of us girls are together having our girltime? Because I seriously doubt that that will happen.

I haven’t explicitly put my foot down saying no, but I did say that since we did the 5 for Christmas I was really hoping for just the 3 of us.

It’s not that I’m against getting to know the guys, but it hurts me seeing my friends happy and me being hurt because I’m alone and have no one and knowing that my closest friends don’t seem to understand or care about my feelings. I don’t know how I can get it across any better without hurting feelings, but she doesn’t seem to understand that she’s hurting my feelings by always insisting we hang out with husbands and always making me feel like the odd wheel.


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