Ok, I know this part isn’t about the book, but let me just start with my frustrations about the oh so wonderful ‘hashtag’. There is a time and a place for it, and actually, I don’t even know if it works properly on this site yet because I’ve never used it. Hashtags can be good when relevant, but when I relevant they irritate me. Relevant – instagram, Facebook, twitter (which I don’t use but I think is where they got started) Irrelevant – texts! I have a friend that likes putting hashtags in texts and it drives me bonkers!

Anyway, back to the point of this post. The next chapter in the book #IntrovertedProblems

So very, very true. I may be sitting with my friends, listening to what they are saying (or at times tuning them out) and on my phone because I’ve had too much of people and need a time out for a few minutes. Doesn’t mean that I don’t want to be a part of the conversation, but sometimes it’s what I need for a little bit of a recharge (pg 27)

Oops, I have done this before. Been so caught up in what’s inside my head and totally forgotten about my surroundings (pg 32)

Yes, I did hear you. But one thing lead to another and it got me distracted. Doesn’t mean I don’t care. Doesn’t mean I wasn’t listening. Doesn’t mean I can’t pay attention. It just means I got distracted. Ok, maybe I’ll ask you to repeat something, but I am here for you, I want to listen, just sometimes I get sidetracked by something that I hear (pg 33)


Know Thyself

Reading through the book ‘Text, Don’t Call’ I’ve come across little introverted comics that seem to speak to me and about me. Some of the comics in the book aren’t as relevant to me as other, but then there are some that I can completely relate to.

There definitely is a big difference between these three. Shy. Antisocial. Introverted. I’m not antisocial, I love my friends and the time I get to spend with them. I am shy, it does take me awhile (make that a log while) to warm up to people and I am quiet at the best of times. I am introverted, I do need my alone time and the time to myself to recharge (pg 10)

I don’t talk, I am very quiet. I’m not the talkative person in the crowd. I do listen, my ears are open and will always give an ear to a friend in need. I may not always have advice to give when you need to talk but I will always give a listening ear when someone needs to talk (pg 13)

Ok, again, this is me. Especially when it comes to online dating. If a friend of mine would ask me to get together for coffee, that I’d be up for, I wouldn’t need to process it. If a guy is asking me for coffee (typically the online type) that I would need to process, I’m not the type that will agree to meet right away, I need time to get to know someone. Time to process (pg 15)

Honestly, don’t fully understand this one, but the last line speaks to me. ‘Refills are freshly squeezed ALONE’. Yes, my recharge level needs to be recharged ALONE. Not sitting on the couch with someone watching tv. But ALONE. I can be on the couch, at home, ALONE. But not with others. I recharge best when no one else is home. When I am ALONE (pg 17)

This is just one chapter out of this book. I’m sure that there are people out there that can relate to parts of this just like I can. Yes, I’m an introvert. And yes, maybe I’m still getting to know what introvertedness really is, and why and how it makes me, well, me. 

Being an Introvert

“And it’s great to be an introvert! There are so many wonderful qualities that come with having this particular preference. For instance, we introverts are wired to focus and concentrate well, and we tend to process things before we speak or act. We’re observant and insightful, often expressing ourselves better in writing than in speech. Because we’re seriously private, introverts may be difficult to get to know, but once we warm up to someone, we make good listeners and trustworthy confidants. We prefer depth to breadth and are fiercely independent.” ~ ‘Text, Don’t Call’ by INFJoe, pg. 5

I just recently found out about this book and finally picked it up today. I am so glad to be reading it as I feel like I can actually tell that there is someone out there that truly gets me.

Yes, I do process things before I speak or act, but unfortunately by the time I have finished processing a thought the opportunity of saying the thought has passed and I missed my window of chance.

I am a private person, chances are, the people that know me best are actually the people who read this blog. I have a difficult time articulating my thoughts and feelings to someone in person, but here it seems so much simpler as most of the readers (if there are even any) don’t know me [ok, I know that one friend reads this, but we have never actually discussed what I write, maybe because she’s giving me space to express myself in a way I feel comfortable and doesn’t want to push or maybe some other reason, but I know that if I wanted to talk about any of this with her that I could]

I always make a good listener, I am a great ear to hear what you have to say. I may not have words of comfort always, or given the most intelligent response, but I am here to listen to you for whatever your needs may be.

Friends, or lack there of …

Ok, I have this friend, we’ve known each other for 3 years now, and I have talked about her before, how my roommate was invited to her birthday and I wasn’t, thinking it may have just been an oversight.

Well, tonight roomie got a text from her, inviting her for lunch after church. And roomie goes on and on talking about it, how friend wants it to be a small group unlike the last time – great, I got no message, I’m not invited.

But then roomie continues talking about one-on-one time with friend while having lunch – ok, that’s fine, if it’s just the two of them, then I shouldn’t be doubting the friendship.

Now roomie is talking that ‘maybe she’ll invite 1 or 2 more people’ or ‘maybe she won’t’ – well, which is it? 

This has me doubting my friendship, doubting my friends. Roomie doesn’t seem to be picking up on the fact that this conversation is hurting me and I don’t want to be a burden to her and make her feel like she’s in the middle of a fake friendship (because honestly that’s how I feel half the time with this friend) but at the same time roomie is always telling me things that burden her and then they go onto me.

Well, you know what? I’m not her social calendar. I have feelings and I do get hurt. It’s not my fault that I keep things buried inside, this is how I deal with things I bury them and hide and stay away from everything and everyone. It’s like I don’t let the real me out. No one truly knows the real me. And maybe that’s why I feel like I have no real friends, because the people I’ve always felt safe turning to are so busy or far away and I’m afraid of letting someone new into my life, so instead I hide away my feelings from everyone and don’t let it show. But I don’t like being this way. I don’t like hiding, I want someone to care. To genuinely listen and not give up until I actually talk about. Not give up when I say I’m fine or that nothing’s wrong, because typically that’s when things are.